The Luminary Journal
By Tuaca Kelly The weather couldn’t receive a complaint from me. The day possessed a warmth and grace that may have included the presence of California Grey Whales – just off the Big Sur, California coastline where I was standing at the time. I was 24-years old, outside in nature under the canopy of daylight stretching my legs. The stretch – to open my abductor muscles – is one I had executed numerous times in my martial art dojo and, at least for me, took some time to melt into despite intention or repetition. While ‘breathing’ through the exercise, a man (that would become one of my deeply valued craniosacral teachers) walked up to me, pointed his penetrating blue eyes directly into mine and said, without affect or apology: “It will always hurt.” Then he left my sphere of determination as smoothly as he arrived. His words found their reason immediately. I knew what he meant. I recognized it as truth. And in the following moments I would both accept and question the poetry I was gifted with. Life, and the growing pains therein, would have many experiences including bliss and discomfort; to concede was to quell suffering. I continued with my stretching to earn my way across the threshold. Years later… Late one night I felt an incredible force vibrate in my throat then fill my mouth. A bewildering interest consumed me as the rising pressure quickly inflated my cheeks. I could not contain whatever divinity was destined to emerge. Lead by a single plosive “puh” sound was an unrelenting stream of language. I began what is known as Praying in Tongues. My grandmother, also an intuitive woman of faith, had prayed in tongues. I never saw her do it, but I knew on the day she crossed over, in the moments I held her while her spirit ascended to ‘no in-between’, that I would have my own experience. And so it began. Although I’d not witnessed it before, I knew exactly what was happening. My body heat rose with the unprecedented message and the velocity in which it came. I was listener, conduit and observer simultaneously. Completely conscious I had the wherewithal to get my iPod and record what I could. As this incredible mix of consonants and vowels were pushing forth, I also understood what was being said. There was instantaneous translation. The key points from that message were to humans, about humans verbatim: “You make it so hard on yourselves. It doesn’t have to be so hard. We’re here to help.” The praying continued untimed. I was awestruck, grateful, fascinated and reverent. Today… Is a perfect moment to annihilate any preconceived notions about expansion of consciousness, transformative healing, growth and the process of becoming: it is work; it is one of the most valuable investments an individual can choose to make; and it can be absolutely excruciating and exhausting at times. Have no illusions about ‘spirituality’ for all emotions and experiences are integral to growth, to building character, to showing ourselves the individual one aspires to see and realize in the actions and thoughts they value. This isn’t to say we have to suffer or go against the direction of ease. There is help and becoming a martyr isn’t the wish of the Sacred – but an educational fate for some, nonetheless. There is always an opportunity to shift course while headed toward a particular goal, to appreciate the hurdles with a new perspective, to accept their characteristics along with your ability and difficulties in learning to surmount them. To echo the essence of the messages that were transmitted and downloaded to me in my schools of wisdom: life is experience, a precious one, and there is a peculiar relief in the act of confessing to the ardent or idealistic mind: it will always hurt and there is always help. Be gentle with yourself and others. Homework: 1. Listen to the ‘hurt’. Growing or building muscles (for example) comes with a price: you’re tearing muscle fiber each time you breach a new weight threshold. This maybe considered by some as a ‘good hurt’. If the pain has a different quality pay close attention to make sure you’re not causing unnecessary injury. In other words: do no harm. 2. Ask for help. When a something is beyond your depth, stop, do nothing, see what comes. The next step maybe to ask for help. It is important to recognize boundaries in any profession or relationship. (This builds integrity!) 3. Have something to look forward to. Your vitality is related to your creativity and desire to grow. Make tangible plans for your self in which you can measure, validate and consciously breathe through the experience, (e.g., playing tennis with a friend once a week; take a language course; join a book club; meditate each day. 4. Applaud your accomplishments. No matter how trivial the task may seem, acknowledge its completion and your care in performing it. This builds a positive attitude, alters your own brain chemistry and raises your energy. When have you moved through pain and what did you learn from it? How do you recognize when you need help and how did you ask for it? Have you made yourself alone with a problem? What was the outcome? To place hurdles on your path on purpose to create challenges? Please share. Etiquette: Only mature and constructive comments directly related to the article’s topic are welcome. Published: June 30, 2014 Tuaca Kelly, spiritual teacher, medical intuitive and master healer serves to assist others in recognizing and developing their multidimensional consciousness and health, critical thinking skills, intuitive discernment, and realizing their soul potential. She lives in the Netherlands with her wife. For further insight visit: www.lovethemessenger.com The Luminary Journal
By Tuaca Kelly A few nights before ‘Donny’ and I were introduced I had a dream about him. There was candor, social ease, humor and playfulness in our exchange. We became fast allies. He and I shared appreciation not only for science, nature and opera, but the imaginative worlds were Vulcans, Hobbits and X-Men dwell. His chiseled face, complemented by the prominent muscles he maintained ritually at the gym, and personality made him subject to objectification – which he did not mind. Flirting was a skill he also possessed and enjoyed using. Some passing interludes would lead to a first date. But how far his adventures would go touched upon another looming consideration that had occupied Donny for virtually half of his life. Barely 40, Donny had been HIV+ for nearly 19-years. Where un-filtered spontaneity had its playful reign, gratitude and glee wasn’t his consistent demeanor whatsoever. When physical symptoms kicked in, or a nice meeting – such as a first date – ended due to concerns of his own, Donny used any disappointment to champion his personal brand of resentment. His cynicism would then dominate and with his seething came contempt for anything or anyone good. In these moments he took deliberate distance from many, including me, and hung out with a male friend that held a similar contempt for the injustice of the world. Donny’s indignation, more than his diagnosis, was at the center of his festering woes and the place where he often chose to live. Though he would ebb and flow with a feeling of satisfaction by challenging himself with projects of all sorts, it was far more reasonable for him to delve into a Tolkien fantasy or Star Trek marathon and seek adventure through imagination than to alleviate his pain through forgiveness, true acceptance and compassion; it was also far more entertaining to call those that acknowledge God imbeciles. Donny felt betrayed. He wasn’t expecting the onset of his adulthood and aspirations to be interrupted. Although he identified as militant atheist it seemed that he held a vile contempt for God; after all who else was there to blame for his life? And if God doesn’t exist, then where does forgiveness come in? And where does that leave Donny? Imagine his conflict. Anyone with chronic illness has considerations that those in full health simply don’t have to take into account. Although physical symptoms and their emotional expressions can inform activities and pleasures including work, one of the greatest impacts on the chronically ill is felt in their social life. Many lose the resources to contribute to the relationships in ways previously experienced. In Donny’s case it was understood by his friends that sometimes his prescription drugs had a profoundly unpleasant effect on his digestive system and that could determine his schedule on a whim. Even though Donny had significant social support from family and friends, and was able to work and earn a fairly decent income, had great medical insurance and still turned heads, his rancid attitude would demolish his more pleasing ‘alter-ego’. Homework: 1. Get perspective. If you are a loved one has a considerable health challenge and for as much as it can inform your/their routine, remember: do not take it personally! Don’t make it about you. Have a melt down to release tension or stress, even to give way to epiphany, but don’t get caught up in your woes. It only lowers morale and depletes energy. 2. Express Gratitude. Begin with the small and significant. Every time when asked how he was, my grandfather used to say: “I woke up breathing.” This was his way of expressing gratitude for his life. He’d seen many challenges yet sought to appreciate his experiences as great teachers. (By the way, today is his birthday, so… Happy Birthday ‘Grandpop’) 3. Forgiveness. Regardless of religious, spiritual and scientific ideology: forgive (all trespasses). To forgive isn’t to condone an act or illness, it is to relinquish the warring dynamic and give new distribution to the energy you could be using for healing. 4. Take no prisoners. Some people have little tolerance for illness and flea at the drop of a handkerchief. Let them go. 5. Cherish the gift. Chronic illness has a way of revealing character and other aspects, beyond the diagnosis, that long for healing. Do you have a long-term health issue? Do you have a family member with a chronic illness? Do you fear being near people who are ill or are you inclined to offer bedside support? Have you left a relationship when illness came into the reality? Please share. Etiquette: Only mature and constructive comments directly related to the article’s topic are welcome. Published: 8 April 2014 Tuaca Kelly, spiritual teacher, medical intuitive and master healer serves to assist others in recognizing and developing their multidimensional consciousness and health, critical thinking skills, intuitive discernment, and realizing their soul potential. She lives in the Netherlands with her wife. For further insight visit: www.lovethemessenger.com. Read the Dutch translation. |
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